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Grandkids


Grandmas and Grandpas can always learn a few things when the grandkids come to visit. The usual tendency is to spoil the heck out of them and then send them packing. The reality is much different. Here are some of the things I learned recently in 2012, while we had three beautiful granddaughters ages 13, 8, and 6, visit us for two weeks. Then we added a 4-year old grandson to the mix for a couple days.

 No shocking news that they have a bunch more energy than we do. Sometimes lasting to the wee hours of the night.  Also no shocking news that they get up way too early.

 Never, ever get up in the middle of the night and treat yourself to a candy bar. Well, that is unless you are smarter than I am and you know enough to destroy the evidence. I left a candy wrapper lying out in the open on the kitchen table. I was treated to a full day of guilt by the constant questioning from two of the three. This whole event reminded me of when my kids found a Wendy’s wrapper in the garbage and gave me the same treatment. Just insert french fries for the candy bar.

o Who had a candy bar?

o Chocolate is bad for you?

o Why don’t we get a candy bar?

o Did you eat the whole candy bar?

o Where are the candy bars?

o Where is my candy bar?

o Chocolate is really bad for you as it will make you fat.

 We even ventured into the land of the birds and the bees while watching the hummingbirds and the bees at the hummingbird feeders.

o “Grandpa, why are some hummingbirds so pretty?”

o “Well the males are colorful so they can attract the female hummingbirds”.

o “Why do they want to do that?”

o “Cause they want to get married and have baby hummingbirds. So you can tell the males from the females by looking at their colors. ”

o Then the questions got tougher, “How do you tell a boy dog from a girl dog?”

 This is when I changed subject.

 I had forgotten the wonderful screams only young girls seem to possess. Boys are not capable of producing the high pitched, piercing sound that emits from a group of young girls running around chasing each other. As my wife would say, “it reminds me of scratching chalk on a chalkboard”

 Sharing is a concept unknown to many young children and it needs to be reinforced and practiced daily with adult supervision.  Such things as timers come in handy.

 Adding one small boy to the mix of three girls causes chaos.

 Three additional neighborhood girls added to the mix causes a major disaster.

 Grandpas can be out of touch

o What is an ear cuff?

o How many ICE AGE movies are there?

o Can I play Herotopia on your phone?

o Grandson, I need to go to my dressing room.

 Grandpa, What? The bedroom has now been designated as a Dressing Room.

 Grandson - I need smelly stuff.   

 Grandpa: What for?        

 Grandson: To keep the girls away.

 Grandson - Do you know that the net in my swim suit is for catching the poop?

 Grandpa – No, but thanks for that bit of information.

 OMG, LOL, BFF, CMU and who would of known that 303, our area code, stands for Mom?

 Grandkids can be out of touch also.

o While playing superheroes, I mentioned I was going into my phone booth to change clothes. They all looked at me until one of them finally asked, “What is a phone booth?”

o What is a typewriter?

o A slide rule?

o Looking out a window on a road trip?

o Playing car games that do not involve electronics. For that matter, games anywhere without electronics.

o What is a chalk board? After I provided the answer, “Oh you mean a whiteboard, we have them at school.”

o An ant farm? What for? Not interested…

o Peace be with you, at church sometimes becomes, rest in peace. That is if you have never been to a Catholic church before and you are only 6 years old.

I am sure by now you got the idea. It was enjoyable to have them here. Memories made that will be shared for years.  Fights that have already been forgotten.